Media Log & Reviews

Past Lives explores a realistic - and perhaps taboo - aspect of marriage (and long‑term relationships in general), and it does so very well. However, I don’t think that all plot devices and characters are realistic.

The main characters, Nora and Hae‑Sung, lose contact when they are 12 years old. Years later, Nora can’t remember the name of her friend when she reminisces about her classmates in South Korea. However, she discovers that Hae‑Sung has actually been searching for her. We learn later that he couldn’t stop thinking about her during his military service. That’s where I start having an issue with the character. We’re supposed to believe that throughout his entire teenage years - and then his college and young‑adult life - not only did his feelings for his 12‑year‑old friend never fade, but he also never met anyone else who could make him forget his middle‑school crush. It feels like a “soul‑mate” or cheesy romance‑movie trope that clashes with the rest of the film. Yes, I found myself unconsciously rooting for him because he’s presented as almost “too good to be true,” while Nora’s marriage is portrayed as somewhat opportunistic.

Or maybe I’m being too immature, and we’re supposed to understand that Nora idealizes Hae‑Sung (as we tend to do when we fantasize about things that never happened). It’s true that, despite seeming so deeply attached to Nora, Hae‑Sung only decides to visit her in Canada when he’s on the verge of getting married, instead of, you know, going as soon as possible when they were still young adults who had recently reconnected. At the same time, Nora doesn’t seem as infatuated as he is; he definitely appears to be the one idealizing her, not the other way around. Perhaps he was made a bit unrealistic so that we would feel why she’s torn.

Nevertheless, it’s a very good movie that can hit a bit too close to home.